Random Motherhood Thoughts

You know, you think you know what motherhood is going to be like but it's really one of those things that what you think isn't the reality. I have a newfound healthy respect for all single parents. I get it now! I think I was very critical of how some people parented but you know, we do the best that we can. And we take it a day at a time. I love being a mom. I really do. But it is an incredibly challenging and hard job. There are times when I think I must have been smoking crack when I decided this was the route I wanted to go; but I realize that having this doubt is normal. I love my girl to pieces. She is the best thing that has ever happened to me.

One of the best pieces of advice I can give to the soon to be single parents, get your network of support now and don't be proud...ASK for help. It can be having them do laundry or watching the baby for an hour while you take a nap. This is my hardest hurdle. I am one of those people who I wouldn't say is proud but who wants to be the girl who can do it all...yeah, you need your friends and family to help you out otherwise you'll fall apart. I almost did. Being stuck in the hospital for several days made me rely on my support network. It made me feel guilty too but I'm a Catholic girl and that's just a Catholic gene, I think.

Grace is finally sleeping in her crib which means I get to sleep in my bed. YEA! I am hoping it will help my sleep situation. She is still on the beta blockers which she hates taking. It does make her less blue though. I'm hoping after the surgery she won't have to take them.

Grace still is leery of Hope. I feel horrible for my poor dog because she is separated from us. She has pretty much the downstairs but she can't be with me a lot because Grace is with me. I'm trying small baby steps to get Grace not to freak out. She doesn't scream as much and she's interested in her. I just pray every night that she'll get over her fear and accept Hope as Hope has accepted her.