Sunday, August 17, 2008

Goodbye Popo!

My beloved grandfather finally found peace on Friday evening, a little after 11 p.m. I think he was waiting for my Aunt Sonia to come into town from Houston before he left us. She didn't get to see him though. She really thought he was going to make it because the hospital said he was improving earlier that day. I knew better. I knew it was coming, but maybe the next week. I went to bed Friday around 10ish because I had been tired from my first crazy week back at work. My mom then called and woke me up at 11 when the lightning/thunder storm hit to tell me to rub fabric softner sheets on Hope to calm her down, if she needed it in the storm (who would have known that softner sheets can do that...takes the static out). I also unplugged my computer because it kept coming on around that time and I thought it was the storm (which now I believe was my grandfather telling me goodbye) Then a little after midnight (I had probably just got back into my deep sleep) my aunt Sonia called from my mom's house to tell me my grandfather had passed. I called my sister and we went over to my parents' house and stayed until 2 a.m. The past few days have been a whirlwind of activity with very little sleep. Never before has a distinct rift between siblings has been so evident. We (being me, mom, dad, and sister) are pretty much the only ones in the middle territory. We're the ones who have to go back and forth to get important burial/funeral information. Actually, let me rephrase that, I've been getting a lot of information and I've been the one at the front line getting the brunt of the frustration from other family members (those in conflict with other siblings or within my own immediate family, those who feel incredibly left out of the process). I have to take it like a big ol oak tree, strong and tall, listen, tell them I'm sorry and ask what I can do to make it better. Yeah, death is WAY easier for the dying than the living. I am physically and emotionally drained and so ready for the services to be done (not to be insensitive or anything). After that, I can let go and have a really good cry instead of these brief little bouts (like now as I write this). The rosary will be Monday night and the funeral on Tuesday. I hope to be a pall bearer but who knows what will come (some family members are VERY weird and traditonal about things like that). Interestly enough, I can't wait to get back to my crazy life as a middle school librarian. My grandmother is doing okay. She said she was glad that the old man is finally at peace. I am glad too. And that's the best thing (next to my friends who have been great sources of support...thank you all so much and I have great love for you all).


HuluMama said...

I'm very sorry about your Popo.